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Pema Chödrön refers to shenpa as a hook we experience that draws us into something. And when it comes to overeating, we get hooked on wanting to eat something that isn’t going to help us, yet we do it anyway, because we haven’t been taught to manage the urges we experience. In this episode of my three-part series on urges, I’m teaching you how to stay in discomfort and deal with the intolerable, even when it’s the last thing you want to do.
Listen closely this week and learn why we have to sit with discomfort in order to heal. Simply acknowledging that you are experiencing an urge is progress, and by practicing this three-step process again and again, you’ll learn to interrupt ancient habits, stay in discomfort, and manage your urges once and for all.
Practice this three-step process to stay with discomfort, even when you don’t want to:
Step 1: Acknowledge that you’re hooked and that you’re feeling the urge – the shenpa. Acknowledge what it feels like and that it is happening, and be mindful of what it feels like.
Step 2: Pause. Take three conscious breaths and lean into the energy. Abide with it, and experience it fully. Assess how the urge feels in your body, and become intimate with the urge; simply feel it and keep breathing through. Rather than reject or resist this energy, embrace it.
Step 3: Get curious about the urge and relax. Don’t make the practice into an endurance test or a contest that you win or lose. Embrace the practice and the experience and then calmly move on. Feel it all instead of resisting or trying to avoid the urge.
It may be that you are only able to conduct this practice for short periods to begin with, but if you keep practicing you will go on for longer and it will become easier. Once you manage your urges, you will begin to heal, and when you know you can sit with and stay in discomfort, you’ll learn that you can do anything.
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